The Truth About Breakups

There is one true reality that holds most people back from ending a relationship; being alone. But why is this such a scary thing to face? Is it because of comfort and routine? Or because we want the passion that has now sizzled into unrequited love?

Oh wait…. being alone isn’t a scary thing at all. It may be impulsive or dramatic at the time but not scary. The only reason your scared is because you’ve come to the realization that there are so many things that are better for YOU instead of a relationship. Most romantic comedies and novels have us thinking it’s bad to be alone, but after you breakup with someone you are terrified that all of those fictional characters might have gone about this all wrong. Breakups are a chance to start over and be happy by yourself. To reinvent yourself into something that you couldn’t be unless you are alone. Because sometimes being alone is the best way to find yourself.

Zooey Deschanel is an incredible social icon and her activity on social media, such as Facebook, portrays how much of a well rounded person she it; I recently came across her page and found this link promoting healthy and equal relationships:

Till next time,



Published by


A little about myself, I'm a Carleton Raven who's grown up in Toronto. Nineteen. Aspiring Editor, Publisher and Writer. Adventure Enthusiast.

5 thoughts on “The Truth About Breakups”

  1. Hello there!
    I found this post particularly interesting because when my boyfriend broke up with me after two years he said the same thing to me “he needs space for himself in order for him to find himself, and that being alone is his only option right now”. We were getting at each other to be honest, constant bickering, fights and ridiculously pointless arguments. I felt that space would be the best option to clear the air and go back to loving the pants off each other! But he wanted to end it for good saying that he really was confused about life in general.
    Yes everyone needs their own space honey, in order for you to grow you need room to do it. But beware… You have the space to grow with the help of a significant other, someone who past the constant arguemnts and fights will realize that you mean more to them than those petty fights. Fights, jealousy and bickering are unhealthy attributes to a realtionship and personal growth but most couples get into arguments because they are to comfortable with each other and just can’t filter their thoughts and words because they feel like they can say or do anything when with their significant other. I’m not justifying fighting, bickering or jealousy in a realtionship. I am trying to tell you that if you really love someone but still feel that you are lost, you just need to communicate with YOURSELF (yes talk to yourself and clear your mind) and the other person in the relationship. Because one day you MAY come to the realization that you let go or lost out on something that could of been so beautiful just because you felt the only way to find yourself was by yourself. Loved ones HELP us define who we are and without most of our loved ones we wouldn’t be able to identify certain good/bad qualities in ourselves. Bottom line honey is that you can either use love to empower you in your search for yourself by fixing the break-up or you can let love haunt you until eventually get past the memory of this person.
    My boyfriend who broke up with me and I have been happily married for the past 5 years and have a child due to everything I pretty much told you. True love only comes once dear and some people miss their oppourtunity. I’m sorry about this large rant you’re post just brought a wave of memories back that I wanted to share. The real truth about break-ups in my opinion is that; we aren’t afraid to be alone it’s that when we lose our partners we are afraid we are losing ourselves and will be left behind. In a sense we are, but if you seriously and truly love someone there are parts of yourself you will lose and maybe won’t like the fact you lost them but this may sound ridiculous but LOVE always pulls through and true love will help you find yourself no matter what. As it did for me.

    P.S: Email me about break-up issues you would like to discuss, I’m a psychiatrist and social worker at many different high schools! I can always listen and provide advice 🙂

    Tracy Ladener


    1. Thank you so much for the comments, I honestly was just venting about a friends issues to make an interesting post! I’m pretty comfortable with myself and my personal relationships but I totally understand how this post could have brought up some past emotions! Please don’t forget that love is defined in so much more than a man and I’m here to talk as well.


      1. Of course it’s defined in more than just a man! Love is formed through many different ways, through many things and many people! I was trying to get across the message that reinventing yourself can be done in more ways than just by yourself! You’re posts are interesting and worded exceptionally keep them coming!


  2. When I initially commented I clicked the “Notify me when new comments are added” checkbox and now each time a comment
    is added I get four e-mails with the same comment. Is there
    any way you can remove people from that service?
    Bless you!


Comments? Questions? Concerns?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s